


Hide and Seek

by charliederidder



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Alex didn't come out yet, Character Development, Dark, Feelings, High School, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Multi, Pre-Canon, School Shootings, Sunset Curve (Julie and The Phantoms), it's 1995
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-01-21
Packaged: 2021-03-12 16:14:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28638351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/charliederidder/pseuds/charliederidder
Summary: There's a school shooting and everyone is trying to save their lives, the same counts for the new amateur band; Sunset Curve. Alex always follows his bandmates when they have to run for their lives, and each time someone else leads the group to safety while Alex tries to keep himself from breaking down. That is until Alex is forced to take charge.A story with a lot of feels and character development from all four of the members of Sunset Curve (tell your friends!).
Relationships: Bobby | Trevor Wilson & Alex Mercer & Luke Patterson & Reggie Peters
Comments: 23
Kudos: 65





	1. The one where Luke took charge

At first it just seemed like a loud bang. The sound that comes when someone gets shoved into a locker in the hallways, only louder than that. Maybe this was what it sounded like when you are inside the locker when someone bumps into it. Maybe a metal bat had hit another metal surface with such force that the sound rang throughout the entire school a couple seconds after it happened. The person must’ve been extremely emotional when they swung the bat if they managed to make that noise.

It took Alex a while to realise what the sound actually was. All of the unlikely scenarios disappeared from his mind when another bang followed. The entire cafeteria stood still after the first shot. There was no sound anywhere, except for the steady beating of Alex’s heart. At the moment he didn’t realise how fast it was beating, he was too busy keeping in his breath. He couldn’t exactly remember why he did it. His entire body was frozen in its place, so maybe it was to control the only thing that was making noise. If only he could stop the beating of his heart at that moment.

When the second shot was fired, the room started to come in action. It took a few seconds and a few sharp shrieks and gasps before people started to run in various directions. No one cared about their bags that they left behind in the cafeteria, everyone was too busy with getting to safety.

Then the third shot was fired. A loud scream followed. It was a girl, screaming out another girl’s name at the top of her lungs. It came from the other side of the school, but the pain in the girl’s voice was enough to know that it was serious.

Alex faintly remembers someone pulling at his sleeve. It was Luke, who apparently had been trying to get them out of there ever since the second shot. ‘‘Alex, we have to get out of here,’’ Luke said with a deep frown on his forehead. Reggie stood a few feet away with his feet pointing towards the exit. He looked over his shoulder to see if the others were going to follow him and quickly started to run away when Bobby gave him a pat on the back.

Alex remembers thinking why the boys didn’t leave him in the cafeteria when he was staring into the depth of nothingness out of shock. He had taken multiple seconds away from them, and those seconds could be the matter between life and death. They could make the difference between having a hiding spot or not. For now they didn’t seem to be looking for one, Bobby was running straight towards the nearest exit. The other three boys followed suit like little ducklings followed their mother. When they got to the entrance at the back of the school, they tried to push the door open without any use. It was locked.

Realisation seemed to hit Bobby as well and he kicked the door furiously. ‘‘Fuck!’’ He screamed. ‘‘I’m so sorry, I should’ve known-- this door is never open-’’ he got cut off by Luke’s hand waving in the air. ‘‘Dude, we don’t have time for that. The rest of the school went for the other exit, but it is too far away now. Maybe it is already locked. We need to find a hiding spot.’’

The four boys started to run with determination. Hiding in a classroom wouldn’t be of any use, there was no place to hide there with only a few desks standing in the room. It surprised Alex that they could still think clearly at that moment, but when one thought came into his mind, an anxiety attack was threatening to come.

_What if they die today?_

He searched for his inhaler in his fanny pack while running, hoping that if he used it now that the feeling would go away. After using it a few times for extra effect, he shook his head violently to get the thought out of his mind. He didn’t want to put his friend’s lives in danger by his stupid anxiety. They were going to survive. They had to.

His sneakers made a loud squeaking noise when the four boys came to a halt in front of a door. Luke quickly opened it and rushed inside, looking over his shoulder to check if the rest followed. Alex came in last and locked the door behind him before sliding down against it. His breath was hitching in his throat and tears threatened to come up.

This was one of the moments where he hated being the emotional one of the group. He wanted to be able to take charge in situations like this, he didn’t want to be the one who needed help to calm down from an anxiety attack. He looked around the room at the other three boys. They were hiding in the backup storage for the PE equipment, one of the few places in the school that had a lock and enough place to hide. That’s why when he looked at Luke, he saw raw leadership in his eyes. Luke knew that this was the perfect place to hide, and he also knew where it was, even though the circumstances weren’t exactly a good environment to think clearly.

Usually Luke wasn’t the bright one out of the four. His grades weren’t extremely bad, but enough for his teachers and parents to be a bit concerned about his future. He was mostly too busy with his music to pay any kind of attention to his schoolwork, and no matter how many times Alex or Reggie tried to encourage him to try harder, he would always shrug it off as if it were nothing.

Luke didn’t make very good life choices, so that’s why his behaviour during a school shooting was so remarkable to Alex. It wasn’t the Luke that he knew, although he was mostly the one in charge of everything. Maybe his clear thinking had to do with the fact that he was always in charge, as if he was responsible for the other three boys to feel safe and secure. Now their safety was actually at the risk, so maybe that’s why he acted that way.

Alex studied Luke once more, seeing how he encouraged Bobby and Reggie to hide behind the large equipment before kneeling in front of Alex. He was a leader, even though he sometimes needed the most help at that moment himself. Alex slowly stood up, looked at the closed door once more before he moved to sit down next to Luke, in front of Bobby and Reggie.

When he studied Reggie closer, he noticed how the boy’s leg kept bouncing up and down. The sound of his shoe repeatedly hitting the floor gave a mix of a relaxing and a nerving feeling. The relaxing part of it was that it filled up the silence and had a steady pace, almost as if Reggie was trying to keep it to a rhythm. It gave something to give focus to, but after listening to it for a while, the reason why Reggie’s leg was bouncing began to sink in. It was because their life was in danger, so the nervousness of Reggie soon began to radiate into Alex’s brain as well and made his stomach take another turn.

‘‘Will you cut it out?’’ Bobby whisper-yelled to no one in particular, making Reggie stop his bouncing. It came out kind of rude, but Alex didn’t expect anything different. Bobby had always been a little bit on-edge, so now that there was a school shooter it was logical that his emotions were increasing. The look on his face was clear; he wanted to run out of the cold, small room and beat the shit out of the person who was walking through the school with a gun. The look quickly made place for one of fear when another gunshot was fired. It was only a short flash of fear, but it was enough for Alex to notice. A wash of sympathy grew inside of him.

Out of his three friends, he had always liked Bobby the least because of his snarky comments and sometimes downright rude attitude. The only times he had seen him soft was when Bobby was hitting on a girl and tried to give her the ‘sweet’ side of him by bragging about being vegan, and during that one, faint second that actual fear was noticeable on his face. Maybe his ‘tough’ attitude was all an act to hide his real feelings. Maybe he was hurting more than anyone in the room with him could ever know.

Because of that one short, soft look on his face, Alex decided to forgive Bobby for all of the times that he had referred to gay people as faggots, for all of the mean comments and for all of the times that he seemed to be unmoved when one of his friends was hurting. Alex realised that he should never judge a book by it’s cover before he got to read the chapters.

Although Luke and Bobby seemed to be close to their usual nature, Reggie seemed to be having a more difficult time staying calm. His shaking hands and legs and his unsteady breath were clear signs of the fact that he was scared out of his mind, just like Alex. The usual Reggie who would make jokes when there was a tough situation or who would stay his dorky self even though the others were feeling blue was gone at that moment. Only an empty shell of who he used to be was left.

He was just one frightened boy sitting in the same room as a tough boy who tried to hide his feelings behind an angry expression, a boy who took charge with the need to protect the others before himself and Alex; a boy who couldn’t hide the tears anymore. This was one of the moments when he hated being the emotional one, because as soon as he started to sob in his sleeve, the other three broke down as well.


	2. The one where Bobby took charge

Alex could feel tears welling up in his eyes when another shot was fired, this time even closer than the ones before. The sound made his ears ring for a bit, not because it was so loud, but because his heart stopped for a second. When the shot was fired, another nauseating thought came to his mind.

_It won’t take long before other people will hear a bullet that went right through your skull._

Alex hated his brain. He hated it. A devastating sob came from his mouth, making the whole room look up and stare at him. Covering his mouth with the sleeve of his sweater, he let another sob come free as the first tears started to pour from his eyes. Luke wrapped his arm around Alex’s shoulders and rubbed circles on his arm.

‘‘No, no Alex, please, _please_ stop crying. It’s okay, it’ll all be okay,’’ he whispered in a soft but panicked tone, looking around the room for support. Bobby just sat in front of the two and stared, eyes a bit wider and more panicked than usual and his arms were wrapped around his knees. Reggie, on the other hand, tried to look away from the scene as he furiously started wiping his own eyes. Alex knew that Reggie could keep his feelings under control as long as someone else didn’t acknowledge them. A feeling of guilt started to wash through his veins as he tried to stop the pitiful cries that came from his mouth.

Luke kept begging him to stop making any noises as he comforted him with his presence, Bobby kept staring and Reggie was on the edge himself, but Alex still couldn’t stop crying. As his body was trembling with fear, he noticed how Reggie’s leg also started to shake. He looked up for a little bit to see him curled up on himself in the corner of the small room with his legs drawn up to him and his arms wrapped around his waist.

Alex had never seen him so vulnerable. Although Reggie sometimes came to school with red and puffy eyes because of another fight with his parents, there had never been a time that the band actually got to see him crying. Only during times when they watched movies such as Bambi, but then there wasn’t a soul on the couch who stayed dry. So now it was different. He sniffled a couple of times and wiped his cheek every time a tear sneaked out of the corner of his eyes, almost like he didn’t want the rest of the room to see him crying. Banging his head against the wall softly, he looked at the ceiling as he tried to stop making noises.

‘‘Reg, I promise that it’s gonna be okay, okay? We just have to stay calm and make no noise before help arrives,’’ Bobby remarked, trying to look Reggie in the eyes. Alex let out another sob when a shot was fired and bit on the edges of his sleeve, pushing his eyelids close. ‘‘Lex, are you okay?’’ It was Bobby once again who spoke in a low whisper. Luke pulled Alex a bit closer and rubbed his fingers a bit faster, as if it was going to provide more comfort. Alex kept his eyes closed and nodded softly after a few moments of silence.

‘‘Do you have your inhaler?’’ Bobby asked. Wondering why the guitarist cared so much, he nodded again. ‘‘Then use it, maybe it’ll help.’’

‘‘Why do you care so much?’’ He didn’t even realise that he said those words until there was a deafening silence. Reggie had stopped his sniffing, Luke stopped rubbing Alex’s shoulder and it seemed like Bobby had stopped breathing. The words came out a bit more rude than he wanted to, but now that they had already been thrown into the atmosphere there was not much he could do about it.

‘‘Because you’re my friend. You all are, and even though I don’t show it often, I love you all,’’ Bobby whispered, looking down at his hands in embarrassment. ‘‘I just don’t want us to die with you thinking that I was this heartless monster that didn’t care about you.’’ The last sentence was spoken even softer than the first, and it showed the human side of Bobby that the band didn’t get to see a lot. But that was not what everyone focused on.

Although it was a heartwarming, short dialogue, the only thing that Alex remembered was the word ‘die’. Bobby didn’t want them to die thinking that he hated them, which meant that he thought that this would be the end of their lives, the end of their band, the end of their friendship. It made Alex’s stomach take a turn as he realised that the tough guitarist, the one who wasn’t afraid of anything, thought that they were going to die. ‘‘We love you too, B. You know that, right?’’ Luke said, a frown appearing on his forehead. Bobby nodded with a sad smile. ‘‘I know.’’

That was it. That was the moment to get a real panic attack, because Luke had just confirmed that he also thought that they were going to die. There was no ‘we’ll be okay’, or a ‘we are going to get out of here’, only a weak squeeze in Alex’s shoulder when another sob came out of him. It was soft and meaningless, it only existed to show that Luke cared, even though it was of no use.

A new shot was fired, someone screamed. Everyone in the small room flinched, Reggie gasped and Luke held on to Alex’s sweater for dear life. This one was close. Too close. While everyone was trying to stop making sounds, Bobby crawled towards the door. Alex felt his eyes widen and he moved a bit so he could see the guitarist better. ‘‘Bobby? Bobby what the fuck are you doing? Get back here!’’ He whisper-yelled, sliding forward for a bit. Luke let go of his shoulders and grabbed his hair as an attempt to calm himself down.

‘‘Bobby!’’ Luke’s voice sounded angry and demanding. ‘‘Ssh!’’ Bobby turned his head over his shoulder and put his finger to his lips as he went to look through the small window in the door. Sliding against the door, he made sure that he was as invisible as possible when he peeked through the window to look at the damage. His hand slowly went up to his mouth, but he quickly removed it when he heard Reggie sniff from the back of the room.

Slowly crawling back to his spot, he took a deep breath and took off his black jacket. He passed it to Luke, who caught it with a confused look on his face. ‘‘He’s coming.’’ The words were cold, serious and absolutely terrifying. Luke seemed to get what Bobby meant and covered himself with the jacket to hide the bright blue shirt he wore. Alex put the edge of his sleeve in his mouth and bit on it as he made himself as small as possible. The rest of the room did the same, hoping that the PE equipment was large enough to keep their bodies out of sight of the small window frame. Heavy footsteps were heard from the hallway, slow, steady, determined.

Alex pushed his eyelids close when the footsteps came closer, a tear slowly running down his cheek. In his head, he started praying. Usually he never believed in God, or rather, didn’t want to believe in God. Something in his heart had always wished that God wouldn’t exist, so He wouldn’t punish him for something that he couldn’t control after being tormented for years. Alex wished that He didn’t exist and started acting on it as well. He didn’t pay any attention during church and always cursed something to himself when his parents wanted to pray before dinner. He knew that it was disrespectful and he also knew that he shouldn’t be doing it, but he guessed that something inside him told him that if he denied the presence of God hard enough, maybe He wouldn’t exist anymore.

Now it was different. No matter how deeply he had always hated the idea of God, Alex couldn’t help himself from praying. Maybe it was because he wanted to have a belief to hold on to during the possibly last minutes of his life, maybe it was because deep down he hoped that God did exist and at least would have mercy on Alex’s bandmates. God couldn’t possibly punish them for something that he had done, right?

There wasn’t any kind of noise in the room. No one moved, no one spoke, no one made any sound. It was almost as if the four of them had stopped breathing, but that silence was interrupted by someone trying to open the door. Someone was violently turning the doorknob multiple kinds of ways before they realised that it was locked. Another tear fell down Alex’s cheek, slowly making its way down to his chin until it dripped to the floor. Normally no one would’ve noticed, but it was so quiet in the room that it made more noise than the ringing in the drummer’s ears did.

Biting the edge of his sleeve even more, Alex opened his eyes. He could see a blurry silhouette of Bobby’s body from the corner of his eye. The boy also had his eyes opened and he looked at Alex. Slowly putting his finger towards his lips as a sign of silence, he closed his eyes again when there were sounds of struggle at the door. Alex didn’t want to look the man who was about to kill them all in the eye, so he pushed them close once again, thinking that this was going to be the last time that he would do so.

Suddenly a voice came from the hall. It was soft. Helpless. In pain. ‘‘H-hello? Is someone in here? P-please help m-me,’’ it was the voice of a young girl, probably no older than fourteen. She was scared, and definitely in pain. Alex opened his eyes again and looked around the room, finding Reggie hiding under his jacket in the corner. He gave the bassist a frightened look to tell him that he had no idea what to do. Reggie only returned this look of fear, and he looked at Luke for backup.

‘‘Please… I know that someone’s in here,’’ the girl continued, sounding a bit more desperate. Alex also looked at Luke now, since he was the unofficial leader from the band and had taken charge when they needed to find a hiding spot. But when he looked at the boy, he didn’t see the amount of leadership that he had in his eyes before. He didn’t seem to know what to do. Suddenly, he went to stand up, but he was immediately pushed back down by Bobby, who gave him a stern look. ‘‘Sit down,’’ he demanded, not expecting any kind of refusal.

‘‘She could die,’’ Luke whispered back, looking at Alex and Reggie for backup, ‘‘what else should we do?’’ ‘‘I saw the shooter just a minute ago, he might’ve heard her and then we are all dead,’’ Bobby whispered sternly. ‘‘If we leave her out there, she won’t survive,’’ Alex chimed in, reaching in his fanny pack for his inhaler. He wrapped his fingers around the plastic tube as if it was going to save his life.

‘‘I don’t want to have your deaths on my conscience, so we are going to leave that door closed. She will find a new hiding spot if she has enough time,’’ Bobby said, ending the conversation by sitting back down. He looked at the rest of the band to make sure that they wouldn’t open the door.

A new voice came from the hallway, it was very deep and masculine and it sent shivers down Alex’s spine. It was the shooter ‘‘Where do you think you’re going, eh? I wasn’t done with you.’’ A gunshot came, and the girl’s sobs were silenced forever. Alex tried to blink through his tears and bit on his lip to suppress a sob. He could only think one thing.

_Bobby had just saved their lives._


	3. The one where Reggie took charge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reggie takes charge in an emotional way, he helps the guys to forget their fear for a moment.

‘‘Alex? Alex! C’mon, wake up buddy.’’ The voice was ringing in Alex’s ears and he let out a soft grunt of annoyance and pain. His arm felt numb, but that feeling quickly went away when a shock of pain went through his body. The grunt turned into a shriek when he tried to move it. Quickly putting a hand over his mouth to drown out the noise he had just made, Alex opened his eyes. 

There he was, locked inside a storage closet filled with Physical Education equipment with his friends by his side, hoping that it would soon all be over, praying for their lives to continue after that day. For a moment, he had forgotten that he was in that place at all. He had forgotten about the shooter and about the fear, for a moment he didn’t remember that girl crying for help before she got shot just a few feet away from where he was hiding. 

It all came back to him in a quick flash, which made him feel just like he felt when the first shot was fired. Shock, confusion, but overall the insane amount of fear that he knew would haunt him in his nightmares for the next couple of months. He didn’t want to die, but more importantly, he didn’t want his bandmates, his  _ friends _ to lose their lives. 

Tears welled up in Alex’s eyes as he tried to process all of the information which he was praying for to be false. He knew that it was all true, but a small part of his mind wanted to push all of his thoughts and memories away to keep holding on to that little bit of peace that he felt the first few seconds after he woke up. 

‘‘Hey buddy, are you okay?’’ It was Luke who spoke. He was also the one to try to keep Alex’s head up for a bit so he could breathe better. Alex nodded in response and grabbed his left arm in pain. ‘‘I’ll take that as a ‘no’,’’ Luke joked dryly, pulling the drummer a bit closer to him. ‘‘What happened?’’ Alex asked as he tried to sit up. He ended up leaning against the wall with his right hand wrapped around his left arm.  _ Fuck, it hurts. _

‘‘After the shooter killed that girl, your breathing sped up and you fainted. You weren’t out that long, I guess only about forty seconds,’’ Bobby chimed in, checking his watch. ‘‘Or maybe a minute.’’

‘‘Do you have to use your inhaler?’’ Luke asked, already zipping open Alex’s fanny pack. Said boy shook his head and simply waved the gesture of kindness and worry away with his hand. ‘‘No, I’m okay. My arm isn’t, though,’’ he grunted deeply, slightly shifting in his spot to get more comfortable. ‘‘Are you all okay?’’ 

The question wasn’t directed to their physical well-being, but to their mental state. Ever since they hid inside the closet, all of the band members had been busy checking if Alex was doing okay. Maybe it was because of his anxiety, maybe it was because of his asthma or because of how he always started overthinking when they got into a bad situation. Whatever the reason was, Alex felt like he had to make up for it. Of course the other three boys had been feeling frightened as well, so it was only fair to show them affection. Not because he felt like he  _ had _ to, but because he loved them.

‘‘I think the bigger problem right now is your arm,’’ Reggie said in a worried but slightly sarcastic tone. That was the first time he spoke ever since the first shot was fired. In some kind of way, it was reassuring that it was a comment that he usually would’ve made as well. It showed an atmosphere of calmness and trust, and it made Alex feel better to see that Reggie was finally getting the boss over his emotions. It might have been a bad thing if he was suppressing his feelings, but the slight twinkle in his eyes as he spoke gave away a spark of hope. 

‘‘I mean, just roll up your sleeve and you’ll see what the actual problem is in here.’’

‘‘I think the biggest problem is that shooter, Reg.’’ 

Bobby’s comment was not received well, as the atmosphere in the room immediately turned back to the darkness that it had been before. Reggie didn’t argue, since he knew it was true, and started to crawl to Alex’s side without saying anything. Bobby gave the three boys a sad look as he looked at his hands in embarrassment, which was his way of apologising. 

In the meantime, Luke had grabbed Alex’s arm with gentle hands and rolled up the sleeve, having to lean over the drummer’s body awkwardly. It wasn’t difficult to spot; a big, red bruise on his upper bicep that was already starting to turn blue. The looks of his arm didn’t make the pain Alex felt go away, and Reggie poking it softly certainly didn’t. Alex let out a sharp hiss when the bassist’s fingers connected with his skin and quickly flinched away. 

‘‘Dude, that does not look good at all,’’ Reggie whispered. ‘‘Well, there’s not much we can do about it now, we can only wonder how this happened,’’ Alex commented, rolling his sleeve back down in case anyone thought of poking it again. ‘‘You fainted, so maybe you just fell unlucky,’’ Bobby chimed in. He started picking on his shoelaces and kept tying and untying them. A new shot was fired, followed by a second and a third one. Multiple people screamed, but it was muffled out by the distance. 

Reggie accidentally bumped into Alex’s arm when he flinched at the sound, immediately apologising and looking for any signs of hurt on Alex’s face, even though tears were pooling in his own eyes from fear. Alex shook his head softly with a sad smile to tell the boy that he had not hurt him. No matter how much the gunshots scared him and no matter how badly he wanted to cry for the people who had just taken their last breath, he couldn’t help but feel relieved about the fact that it was at the other side of the school. 

That was until he remembered that there was a corpse right in front of the door they were hiding behind. The corpse of a fourteen year old girl.

Luke quietly crawled over the floor and sat down next to Bobby, whose leg was shaking with fear. It was clear that both of them had no idea what to say to comfort each other, not even Luke, who used to be the one giving pep talks to everyone when they were feeling down. Maybe it was different because this time their emotions couldn’t be washed away with a song. 

Suddenly Reggie spoke. ‘‘Who delivers the mailman’s mail?’’ It was obviously a joke to make the band feel better, but the serious look on his face made the group doubt that for a bit. ‘‘T-the…. mailman’s mailman?’’ Luke offered with a confused look on his face. Alex looked back at the bassist to see if that was a correct answer, sniffing slightly to make the last few tears that had been in the corner of his eye disappear. ‘‘Don’t ask me, I don’t know either,’’ Reggie remarked. 

There was a short moment of silence. ‘‘If a kid has been bad and wants coal for Christmas, what does Santa do?’’ At this point the other three band members let out a sad huff of laughter. Bobby had stopped tying his shoes and looked at Reggie with serious eyes and a frown on his forehead. ‘‘Buddy, I think we are going to have to have a little talk about Santa Claus,’’ he joked. Luke snorted at the comment, looking around the room to see if anyone else was amused as well. 

While Bobby only got a slight grin around his mouth, Alex was smiling widely. Reggie was in the corner of the room once again, smirking with pride. It was obvious that he had only asked those dumb questions to make the other three members of the band feel better, and it seemed to be working. For a moment,  _ just a moment _ , they all felt a bit more calm. They had all forgotten what was going on outside of that door, and no matter how quickly the mood had darkened after there was another silence, the entire room tried to hold on to that short moment of peace and happiness. 

\-----

It had been around forty minutes -although it felt like forty hours- ever since someone had said something in the room until the lights went out. At first there was only a faint buzz and a bit of flickering, but then the few lamps that hung above their head stopped working. It was dark. Too dark. Only a little bit of light came through the small window in the door, but that was not nearly enough to clearly see their surroundings. 

Alex could still see his friends sitting next to him and in front of him, which was the most important thing at the moment. Of course there was no way that they could leave without him knowing, but the feeling of their presence calmed him down. Having to rely on only the sound of their breathing was not enough comfort, so the fact that he could still faintly see silhouettes of where his friends were sitting was a major asset. 

A new gunshot was fired. _Number twenty seven within those forty minutes_ , Alex counted. He shut his eyes as a tear fell down his cheek. The darkness, the gunshots, the fear, it was all becoming too much. A sniff was heard from across him. He looked at the shoes in front of him and saw that Luke’s were shaking a bit every time there came a sound from their direction. ‘‘Hey Luke, are you okay?’’ Alex whispered softly, not daring to raise his voice out of fear. The darkness had made his hands shake and his lips tremble, so he was already afraid that he was making too much noise. 

Luckily Luke seemed to have heard his question. ‘‘Y-yeah, I-I’m fine guys,’’ Luke’s voice cracked while he spoke as another sob escaped his mouth. ‘‘It’s all gonna be okay, I promise,’’ Bobby said, moving a bit closer towards Luke to comfort him. ‘‘How can you be so sure?’’ Silence followed, a bit too long not to be concerning. There was a faint buzz from the ventilation system right above their heads that made sure that the silence wasn’t complete. 

After a few seconds too long, Bobby spoke again. ‘‘I’m not.’’ When the sound of another shot came, Luke’s sobs increased, together with the tears that flowed down Alex’s cheeks. _Twenty eight. A total of thirty nine._ Another shot was fired. _Forty._

‘‘My parents keep fighting every day, so badly that I’m afraid they’ll hurt me or my siblings one day,’’ Reggie gasped out after the third shot was fired within ten seconds. _Forty one._ Alex’s head shot to where Reggie was sitting, seeing that he was crawled in on himself based on his silhouette. Without thinking, Alex grabbed the bassist’s hand to comfort him. He was surprised to feel the shaking fingers of the other boy wrap around his. 

‘‘This morning I left without them noticing because they were too busy arguing about something.’’ Another silence fell. ‘‘What if the last time they ever saw me was last night, when I got home late from band practise? What if the last last thing I told them was how they were bad parents after they argued with me about it for an hour?’’ Alex tightened his grip around Reggie’s fingers in a gentle squeeze. He knew what the boy was trying to do; he was trying to have a band bonding in case that would be the last. 

‘‘I know for a fact that they love you, Reg. They love you so much, and they know that you love them back. You can tell them once all of this will be over,’’ Alex replied, giving a weak smile even though no one could see it. Maybe that was for the better, because then they couldn’t see the doubt in his expression.

‘‘The reason why I always try to stay close to you when we walk down the street at night is because I’m afraid of the dark,’’ Luke said softly, sliding his feet closer to himself and out of Alex’s sight. ‘‘It is always quiet at home during the night because my mom and dad are both working night shifts. I’ve had to sleep alone for as long as I can remember, so I also kept my fear of the dark. I’m afraid that I’m alone once the sun starts to set.’’ 

‘‘We’re all here by your side now, Luke. We’re not going anywhere. Not now, not ever,’’ Bobby answered with the most soft voice he had ever given. Luke whispered a short ‘thanks’ before making a bit more noise by moving to become more comfortable. ‘‘Bob, why don’t you show that soft side of you more often?’’ Reggie asked carefully. Bobby sighed. ‘‘Because if people see good, they expect good. I don’t want to have to live up to anyone’s expectations. It’s because I’m hoping that people will avoid me if I’m rude and emotionless. Then  _ I  _ can avoid disappointing or hurting someone.’’

‘‘There’s no reason for you to disappoint us, ever. We can all see what kind of a guy you really are, and we respect you for it. Hell, we love you for it,’’ Reggie piped up, raising his voice a bit too much for comfort. He seemed to realise that himself as well, since the next sentence was almost too soft to understand. ‘‘Do you have anything you wanna share?’’ He asked, giving Alex a slight nudge in his side. The question was loaded with doubt and sympathy that said ‘I don’t care what it is, just tell us’. 

If only he knew what had been keeping Alex down for so long. Alex had even been afraid to tell his friends, thinking that their reactions might be bad. He even was too afraid to tell his own parents, so why would he think that the complete heterosexual band would accept him for who he is?

‘‘You don’t have to say anything unless you want to,’’ Reggie offered. Another gunshot. _Forty two._ Alex flinched and bit his lip. ‘‘No, I want to. You guys need to know the truth.’’ A moment of silence came which was interrupted by a new gunshot and a scream of pain. _Forty three._ A small tear rolled down his cheek. 

‘‘I-I’m… I’m- I’m gay.’’ He hated himself for stuttering so much and all of the confidence he felt before disappeared before the rest of the band could even answer. ‘‘I wanted to be honest with you guys and now you know, see what you do with this information and I get it if you don’t want to see me again or if you want to throw me out of the door because I know that it’s a sin and-’’ his rambling got cut off by Reggie, who squeezed his hand. Reggie was still holding his hand. _Are they okay with it?_

‘‘Alex, Jesus, calm down. We don’t hate you, we are not going to abandon you and we are definitely not going to throw you out of the room. We love you, okay? This doesn’t change anything,’’ he said, hugging Alex tightly. The drummer tried to find his other two friends by swinging his free hand through the room. ‘‘Come here Luke, you are not alone here. We’re all here by your side,’’ he said, letting go of Reggie to give Luke a warm hug. 

‘‘Bobby?’’ There was a bit of shuffling before Bobby joined the hug. ‘‘You have never disappointed any of us, and you never will as long as you are yourself, okay? Promise me that you won’t beat yourself up about something that you did, it doesn’t matter to us.’’ Bobby murmured something in agreement, squeezing the two a bit to show that he cared. It wouldn’t have made a difference a few minutes earlier, but now it showed so much more than just kindness. It seemed as if every movement that someone made was going to be their last, so everything had a fearful but loving meaning. 

A new shot was fired. _Forty four._ Alex pulled at Reggie’s sleeve to get him to join them, which the boy did with a little bit too much enthusiasm. 

‘‘I love you all so much more than you could ever imagine.’’

He did. He always would.


	4. The one where no one could take charge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex realises that soon he would be the one to take charge.

‘‘Why are they taking so long?’’ Luke asked desperately. It was a question they all have been asking themselves for the past few hours. Out of context one might think that it was about a couple of people who had been late to a certain occasion, in context someone could say that they were thinking about the shooter who still hadn’t found them. It was none of those answers, but still the entire band knew what Luke was talking about without having to ask him. 

The only thing in the room that was able to tell the time was Bobby’s watch, but he had to hold it up to the small window in the door to be able to read the time. No one even dared to move a few inches in that direction, let alone that they would expose their wrist to the outside world while a shooter was walking around. They had to tell the time by their biological clocks, and all of those said that it had been a long time. 

Of course it could have been the fear and the insecurity of what was going to happen that made time go a hundred times slower, but all of their subconsciousnesses said that they had been in that room for at least three hours. That brings them back to the question Luke asked;  _ why are they taking so long? _

It wasn’t about some friends, it wasn’t about the shooter, it was about whoever should’ve brought them to safety, back in the open air and in the arms of their loved ones. The police, firefighters, a swat team, it didn’t matter who it should’ve been. Three hours was long,  _ too long. _

‘‘I don’t know,’’ Alex answered, looking into the darkness with a blank expression. 

His eyes had gotten used to the lack of light by now, so he could see everyone’s bodies a bit more clearly now. Instead of only seeing Luke’s shoes, he was now able to make out in what position he was sitting and whether he was breathing or not. He still couldn’t see what colour his shirt was or if he was silently crying or not, but the little bit of proof that he was alive in front of him was calming. He had the same feeling with Bobby and Reggie, although Reggie was so close that there wasn’t any trouble to see if he was still there.

A few things had changed over the past few hours. The gunshots had lessened, but not enough to be able to go outside.  _ Seventy five, _ Alex counted. Most of them must’ve been a crucial hit, since there rarely were multiple shots within a few seconds. The shooter had accuracy and skill, that was clear from everything. If it was just some crazy person who hadn’t thought it all through, the police would’ve rescued them all long ago. Every time another shot is fired the students are reminded that they are dealing with a professional, which makes it all a million times scarier.

Alex’s hands hadn’t stopped shaking since the first shot, except for when he was holding Reggie’s hand. That had most likely to do with how he wanted the bassist to think that he wasn’t afraid, and that he would protect him at all costs. The second thing was true, but the first wasn’t. He was still scared out of his mind.

A new gunshot was fired, ten minutes since the last one. Three more followed.  _ Seventy nine. _ They were fast, close to one another, not the way the shooter usually did for the past four hours. Something inside Alex told him that it might’ve been their rescue who shot, since it was so different from what they had heard before, but another part said that he was being stupid. There was no reason to think that there might be rescue, the only thing that’s different is how a deadly weapon is used. Whatever is going on, stepping outside the door will end in death. 

‘‘What do you think is going on out there?’’ Reggie asked, giving Alex a look that was hard to make out in the dark. The only thing that was clear were the tears that were blinking in his eyes, threatening to fall. Alex grabbed his shoulder and squeezed it softly, ignoring the pain he felt in his arm when he moved it. Reggie accepted the gesture, leaning a bit into the touch. 

‘‘Whatever it is, we have to wait in here before someone comes to tell us that the shooter is gone,’’ he answered, looking around the dark room in some kind of hope that everyone was able to see his stern expression. There was no sound of agreement, but the silence between all of them was clear that everyone would take his advice. 

When a new shot was fired, Alex began thinking. First, he counted.  _ Eighty. _ He began thinking about his friends. About how Reggie managed to calm them all down and distract them even though he bumped into Alex’s injured arm every time there was a noise from outside of the room. If he hadn’t done that, they all would’ve gone crazy. It was a different kind of leadership than Luke and Bobby had, but the emotional part had been just as important as the physical safety that the other two boys had taken charge of. 

Luke had been the only one who was able to keep a cool head during the first ten minutes, while the other three were too busy trying to comprehend what was going on. If he hadn’t done that, they might’ve gotten a bad hiding spot which would end in a bullet through the head. He had pure leadership and knew that the band would follow him with every step. 

Bobby was the one who was able to put his emotions aside to take care of the other three, and he was able to keep his head clear when it came to making choices. If he hadn’t told them to stay down when the fourteen year old girl was begging on the other side of the door, they all would’ve died.

All of those situations were different, but just as important. The three boys had been at their best and took advantage of it by helping out the others. No one expected anyone in return besides the hope that they would make it out of the room. They had saved their lives without even realising that they were doing so, making them better heroes than anyone Alex had ever seen in any movies. Maybe that was because they were each other's heroes. 

A famous writer once said that as soon as there is an emotional bond, things get more meaning. A small gesture turned into the gift of happiness for a whole day, and something as simple as saying goodbye and parting ways became one of the toughest things to do. Of course the emotional bond helped with the need of protecting others and the feeling of safety when someone took charge, but Alex felt that it was a bit different. It felt as if the bond between every member of the band grew stronger whenever someone showed kindness and took effort to protect one another. Every gesture was even better than the first, even though the meaning of the things they did grew smaller. 

It also might have had to do with the fact that they all thought they were about to die, but that was not the mental point Alex was trying to make. 

Four more gunshots,  _ eighty four. _ Alex flinched slightly and shut his eyes once more, trying to keep in the tears that were flooding his eyes. The pain in his arm was nothing compared to the one he felt in his heart every time a shot was fired. 

A new gunshot.  _ Eighty five. _ It was close.  _ Too close. _ Alex’s eyes shot up to meet the scared gazes of the others. They were clear to make out of the dark; the wide eyes reflected the little bit of light that came from the small window in the door. Three pairs of eyes met his, as if it was now his turn to take charge. Pressure was put on his chest. He couldn’t do it, he didn’t know what to do. 

A loud scream came from the hallway outside of the door. It was a girl screaming out someone else’s name. ‘‘Leya!’’ The voice was filled with pain and grief, and it didn’t take Alex long to realise that the girl was probably looking at the body that lay in front of their hiding spot. The loud shuffling a few feet away from them confirmed his suspicions, but the new knowledge didn’t calm him down. If someone was screaming, it would most definitely draw the attention of the shooter. For all they knew, the man could figure out that he hadn’t looked inside the locked closet. Who knows what could happen after that. 

The girl sobbed silently, but loud enough to hear. ‘‘P-please, Le-Leya, you c-can’t just l-leave me like this,’’ the girl stammered with a broken voice. Alex closed his eyes and pushed his head against the wall as he bit his lip hard enough to draw blood. A small tear dropped from the corner of his eye. The lump in his throat increased when the girl started to talk softly, her words combining to make a beautiful poem. It didn’t need to rhyme, the emotion behind it was enough to make the entire room silently cry. 

‘‘Should this be the moment where I look you in the eye? I- I can’t. They are open and staring at me without you inside them. This is not how I’ll remember you. And everything, it will surely change even if I tell you I won’t go away today,’’ she chuckled dryly, ‘‘Please forgive my broken promise that you would never see me cry, looking at you while you stare back without any life inside makes it difficult. And remember: everything is temporary, you can rest your head.’’ 

It somehow sounded like a song, as if she had rehearsed this for months in case this would happen. New tears flooded from Alex’s eyes when he heard footsteps from down the hall. They were heavy, determined, just like they had been when Leya was killed a few hours earlier. ‘‘You thought you could escape from us, huh? Thought wrong sweetheart.’’ The deep, masculine voice that sent shivers down everyone’s spines was back, this time more threatening than he had been before. 

Hearing that the gun’s safety was being turned off, Alex prepared himself for another traumatizing moment. He put his hands over his ears, kept his eyes closed and made himself as small as possible. When the shot was fired, the sound of a body hitting the floor came soon after.  _ Eighty six.  _ Alex was surprised that he could even hear that, since his ears were ringing so loudly that he was afraid someone else might be able to hear it as well. 

Tears fell down his cheeks, and he tried to look for the warmth of someone else’s body without opening his eyes. He once again found Reggie’s hand in the dark, and their fingers intertwined once more. They both squeezed occasionally, trying to comfort the other. 

New footsteps were heard, and with them came a new voice. This was also a male, but a lot younger than the one who had shot two people only a few feet away from the band. 

‘‘Stephen, we can’t stay any longer. The police cars have surrounded us everywhere, I don’t think we can keep up the hostage act any longer. We have already killed over fifty students ever since they arrived here, they won’t hesitate any longer before they decide to take the risk,’’ the voice said. He sounded like he had only just gotten out of high school, maybe around the age of twenty. He was a lot less determined than the other man, Stephen, who never even had a slight tremble in his voice when he spoke. 

‘‘Listen Jake, we came here with one hundred bullets. We made a promise to give them all a nice purpose. Once we’re done with that, it’s over,’’ Stephen responded. 

Alex’s eyes shot open as he realised the importance of this information. They had a total of one hundred bullets, and they had already used eighty six of them. Fourteen bullets left, fourteen lives left to lose. They only had to make it through the next fourteen shots and then it would all be over. When he looked around the group, he saw that no one else picked up on this information, so now  _ he _ was of crucial importance. 

For once in his life, Alex thanked himself for having anxiety. His anxiety made him count the shots to make him more nervous about what was going on outside, and now it had possibly saved their lives. 

Possibly.


	5. The one where Alex had to take charge

Although Alex felt some kind of warm feeling inside his chest, he couldn’t help but feel more frightened than he had been before. Not only was he not certain of his theory -because what if the shooters decided to blow the school up when they were done with their bullets?-, but the two men also stood only a few feet away from them, talking about what was going on. 

He closed his eyes once more, thinking that if he didn’t use his senses he might make less noise. Of course it was all in his mind; the only noise that came from his was his rapid breathing and the fast beating of his heart. He didn’t move and didn’t make a sound, but still he was afraid that he might become the reason for everyone's death. When he closes his eyes, he feels more secure, as if he were an ostrich that pushed his head into the ground to avoid confrontation. Somewhere inside he felt like it was stupid, but the frightened little boy in his head wouldn’t stop screaming that he was making too much noise. 

‘‘What happens when we get to one hundred?’’ Jake asked Stephen. He didn’t sound very sure of himself, almost like he regretted all of this. Alex made a mental note in his mind to remember that if he had to confront one of the two, he should go with the younger one. For all he knew the boy could have been pulled into this mess by Stephen. 

‘‘Don’t you worry about that now, my dear boy. Just make sure that you give every bullet a nice body. We came here with a goal, and you know what happens when we don’t achieve it,’’ Stephen replied, his voice as deep and threatening as usual. Alex felt his breath hitch in his throat at the sound of it, feeling goosebumps travel all the way to his toes. He tried his best not to shiver, afraid to make noise in the process. 

‘‘I just feel like we’ve killed enough students already. I feel more guilt every time I have to look one in the eye,’’ Jake responded desperately. ‘‘Jake!’’ Stephen roared. There was a sound of struggle before a body was pushed against the door to the storage room. Alex put the edge of his sleeve between his teeth and bit down on it harshly.  _ Don’t come in here, don’t come in here, don’t come in here, don’t-. _

The body was pushed against the door once more, making a loud, hollow noise alongside Jake’s whimpers of pain. ‘‘You and I made a promise to God, do you want to fail Him? Do you want to go to hell?’’ It wasn’t a question, that was clear from the entire tone that was used during the sentence. Jake answered anyways, probably out of fear. ‘‘No! Of course not! It just feels so  _ wrong. _ I don’t want to do this anymore, we will go to jail anyways, might as well stop now before it gets worse.’’ 

‘‘Listen to me!’’ Stephen was screaming at this point, his voice so violent that he seemed to have jumped right out of a horror movie. Only this was a real horror movie, and this was a thousand times scarier. ‘‘You are going to listen to me now, little  _ boy, _ ’’ the last word was spit out as if it were poison, ‘‘you and I are on a mission here, one that I got directly from God. We are going to fulfill that quest, and then we’ll have ensured seats in heaven.’’

‘‘But you  _ didn’t! _ ’’ Jake spat back. From the sounds of struggle against the door, Alex could make out that the boy who was probably only a few years older than him was trying to get out of the other man’s grip. 

Alex tried to find Reggie’s hand in the dark to intertwine their fingers once again. When he found it, he felt that Reggie’s fingers were shaking, just like his. There was no need to hide it, the fear was too dominant to even care about comforting someone else with confidence. Besides that, he was too busy to keep his tears under control in case an unwanted sob tried to escape his throat.

Stephen’s voice had gotten a lot softer, so when he spoke, Alex had to try his best to understand what he said. ‘‘What do you mean, ‘I didn’t’?’’ His voice was slow and calm, which sent shivers down everyone’s spines in the room. The calmness in his voice only showed how much aggression was underneath it. 

‘‘I mean that God didn’t give you this ‘task’, your fucked up mind did. Just listen to yourself, you had a  _ dream _ about shooting multiple people and you reached day hundred of your new job, and suddenly it’s your duty to  _ kill fucking fifteen year olds?! _ God had nothing to do with this, you are sick and you know it. I’m out of this, you won’t reach one hundred without me so you might as well give up.’’ Somehow Jake had gotten the courage to stand up against the other murderer, and even though he had killed multiple people within those hours, Alex couldn’t help but feel sympathy for him. 

It was silent for a while, the only sound being Stephen’s heavy breathing. He sounded like a beast that was about to be unleashed, his breahts becoming more steady and quicker. ‘‘You have no idea what kind of mistake you are making,’’ he said. ‘‘No, letting you trick me into this was a mistake.  _ All of this _ was a mistake. I’ll say it again, I’m  _ done. _ ’’ The sound of someone loading their gun came. 

Reggie started to squeeze Alex’s hand in fear, the drummer doing the same. He couldn’t see his other bandmates in front of him because he was too afraid to open his eyes, but he knew that they were holding on to each other as well. 

Another gun got loaded. ‘‘You are not going to shoot me, Jake. You don’t have the guts anymore. Your mission will end right here, I have a bullet with your name on it.’’ Stephen was still certain of his case, and it sounded like he meant what he was about to do. Alex could almost feel the mischievous grin on Jake’s face as he spoke. ‘‘Great. Once a bullet is meant for someone, it won’t go through anyone else’s head, will it?’’

‘‘I see that I taught you well,’’ Stephen replied, sounding somewhat proud. ‘‘Funny, I also have a bullet with my name on it. Guess you won’t be able to kill one hundred after all,’’ Jake said. A gunshot came, sounding louder than any of the others that had been fired before. A muffled thud followed, most likely the body falling to the floor. 

Tears started to flood Alex’s eyes, afraid of what might happen next. He heard Stephen scream out a sharp ‘’No!’’, and he suddenly felt proud of Jake. The twenty year old man had known how the older man would react, and how it would throw all of his plans around. Proudly, Alex counted in his head another time. 

_ Eighty seven. _

Stephen cursed something from under his breath. ‘‘Forgive me, God, for as my partner did not engage in the plans until the end. As a return for this wasted bullet, I’ll take my own life immediately once the task is done.’’ For once, his voice wasn’t so certain and threatening anymore. Grief wasn’t present in any kind of way, but guilt certainly was. The gun got reloaded and a new gunshot followed not even a second later. Stephen sighed deeply.  _ Eighty eight. _

It was silent for a brief moment before the loud footsteps began again, disappearing a bit more with the second. Alex didn’t dare let out a ragged breath until they were completely out of ear shot. He slowly opened his eyes and looked around the room. Even though he felt a whole lot better than he had before, the rest of the room was only in shock of what had just happened. Multiple tears were shed, but no one dared to say a word. 

‘‘There are three bodies in front of our door now,’’ was the only remark that came from the three boys. Reggie looked at the rest of the group for any kind of acknowledgement, but all he got was a couple of stares that weren’t even directed to him. When he looked to his side to face Alex, it was clear that he was surprised to see the drummer in a more optimistic mood than he had seen him at any point during that day. Of course Alex wasn’t smiling from ear to ear, but the fact that he wasn’t crying and crawled in on himself alone was enough to make clear that he knew something. 

‘‘What’s going on?’’ Reggie broke the ice. ‘‘I guess that you guys haven’t been counting?’’ Alex asked in a soft whisper. ‘‘Counting what?’’ Luke asked in confusion.

‘‘The gunshots.’’

‘‘Why would we ever want to count those?’’ Bobby fired back.

‘‘Because then you would know that Stephen only has twelve bullets left.’’

‘‘How do you know that?’’

‘‘By listening.’’ When he didn’t get a reaction from the rest of the group, he sighed deeply and started to explain. ‘‘My anxiety made me count the amount of bullets, I don’t know why either, but now I know that eighty eight bullets have been fired. Just a minute ago, the shooters wouldn’t stop talking about the hundred bullets they had. That means that he only has twelve bullets left, so we can make up a plan around that.’’

Luke started to sit a bit more upright. ‘‘So we only have to wait for another twelve bullets?’’ he asked, sounding somewhat excited at the idea of this all finally being over. Alex felt his expression darken as he lowered his shoulders a bit. ‘‘I don’t know, I don’t think we should wait.’’

‘‘You mean that we have to go out there? While he still has bullets?’’ Bobby commented as if Alex were mad, and the boy didn’t blame him. Even in his own head it sounded like a crazy idea. ‘‘Didn’t you hear what Stephen said? He said that he would take his own life as well, heaven knows in what kind of way. What if he blows the school up? We should take the risk, it’s only twelve bullets.’’ The last bit  _ definitely _ sounded like madness, since Alex said it as if twelve things that could cost their lives were nothing. 

‘‘You really  _ are _ crazy,’’ Reggie said, still not letting go of the other boy’s hand. Alex tried to look all three of the boys in the eyes with determination, but the darkness in the room made it hard to see their faces. ‘‘Spare me the insults, just listen for a moment. When he isn’t in this part of the school, and we are really quiet, I don’t see a problem with getting out of here.’’ Another silence fell. ‘‘This is going to work, you just have to trust me. I would never do anything to put you in danger.’’

After a bit of doubting, the group agreed, and they started to sit up a bit more straight to prepare themselves. The group sat in silence for a while, waiting for Alex’s sign that they should leave the room. Meanwhile, Alex was only thinking one thing:

_ When we get out of here, I’ll never be able to look at this closet again. _

Somehow it felt weird to leave the small, oppressive room. It held memories, and even though they were all the most traumatic memories any one of the boys had experienced, it had some kind of secure aura around them. Maybe that was because it had become their hiding spot and it had prevented their deaths multiple times by its lock and small window. Maybe it was because the boys had opened up at their most vulnerable moments. Or maybe it was just because there was an active shooter right outside of that door.

A new gunshot came. It was far away, from around the other side of the school.  _ Eighty nine. _ ‘‘Now,’’ Alex demanded, being the first one to stand up. He slowly made his way over to the door, looked through the small window and, when he saw nothing but empty halls, he opened the door by unlocking it. When he tried to push it open, the three bodies that lay in front of it suddenly came to mind. He pushed the image away and pushed harder, feeling the weight become less once the other three boys started to push as well. 

The door gave in and started to move far enough to make a small gap through which they could escape. Alex slid his thin body through, and immediately decided to not look to his right, trying to avoid the sight of three corpses. The sound of a door clicking came, and he knew that the last one just left the storage closet. Suddenly he felt naked, exposed. Without the room, there was nothing to protect them. 

He pushed the thought away once again and started to walk to the entrance at a steady pace. Grabbing onto his painful arm, which started to ache really badly at all of the movements, he looked over his shoulder to see the other three boys follow him suit. 

Luke seemed to be uncomfortable not being the one to lead the group and kept looking behind him for any signs of danger. Bobby had a determined look on his features, almost frightening Alex with his cold stone expression. Reggie, who was the closest to him, tried to stay as close as he could and kept giving the drummer scared looks. Alex wasn’t sure if they were out of sympathy for his arm or out of fear for the shooter, but he decided to pay no attention to it. 

A new gunshot was fired. It was a lot closer than the one before, but there was no turning back now.  _ Ninety.  _ Alex started to walk a bit faster until he was basically running down the halls. Making sure that he wasn’t making too much noise, he once again looked over his shoulder at the other three boys. All of them had managed to keep up and apparently the feeling of freedom was getting close enough for them to push away their fears. 

Someone screamed, a boy. It sounded like he was pleading for help, way too close for comfort. A new gunshot was fired, close enough to make Alex’s ears ring again.  _ Ninety one. _

Running down the hallways by now, he made a few quick turns until he came to the front doors. When he saw the way the handle was positioned, his greatest nightmare came true. Sweat started to dampen his face, making a salty, wet mixture together with the tear tracks that ran down his cheeks. He grabbed the handle and started to pull with all his might, ignoring the immense pain he felt in his arm. ‘‘Fuck,’’ he cursed under his breath, letting go of the door handle and grabbing his arm in pain. 

‘‘Are you okay?’’ Reggie asked, softly touching Alex’s arm. ‘‘I’m fine, the door is locked,’’ Alex responded quickly. ‘‘The other entrance is at the other side of the school, we won’t be able to make it,’’ Luke chimed in, a deep frown forming on his face. ‘‘Kick it in. Kick the lock, it’ll make noise, but it will work, I swear,’’ Alex said frantically. Bobby didn’t take another second to think and started to slam his foot into the door multiple times. The noise was loud, and footsteps came. 

Regret started to sink in as the shooter came close to the four boys. Oddly enough, he didn’t shoot, not even when Bobby kept kicking the door rapidly. Fear started to take over Alex’s body and he backed against the wall. Stephen came closer, but stopped a few feet away from them. The sickening grin on his face made Alex’s stomach take a twisted turn. ‘‘Would you look at that, four little mice caught in my trap,’’ the man said, loading his gun. 

Bobby also turned around now, and his eyes grew wider at the sight in front of him. ‘‘You thought that you could run, didn’t you? Wouldn’t be the first who tried.’’ Stephen nodded his head to the side and, even though Alex refused to move his head, he could see multiple bodies lie around the halls, blood pouring from their fatal wounds. He tried to push the thoughts and images away as he faced Stephen. 

‘‘Too bad you’ll be a body that lies around here as well,’’ he said, smirking slightly. It wasn’t the best decision he ever made, but at that moment it felt right. ‘‘Your body will lie here as well, in the same hallways as Jake’s. Too bad he changed his mind, huh? Now you have to bring another sacrifice to make up for it,’’ he continued, teasing the shooter in an attempt to catch him off guard. He took a small step forward, trying to mask his fear with confidence. 

The other three boys just stood and watched, trembling on their legs. ‘‘Ninety one shots have been fired, only ninety have killed.’’ Stephen’s eye started to twitch and his breath was speeding up. Alex dared to take another step forward. ‘‘One hundred bullets, a maximum of ninety nine bodies. It’s killing you, isn’t it?’’

‘‘With my body it will be one hundred, I will finish my task!’’ Stephen roared, aiming his gun right at Alex’s forehead. Alex noticed that he didn’t seem as confident as he was before, and decided to take advantage of that. ‘‘Will you, though?’’ He teased, stepping forward once again. There was only four feet of space between them now, but Alex didn’t back down. He took small steps as he spoke. 

‘‘I thought God’s task was to kill one hundred students with your one hundred bullets. Even if you will kill yourself as well, you have already failed. Ninety nine bullets have gotten their fate, one has been wasted. Or should I say, two? The one Jake shot himself with was meant for a student, and he wasn’t one, was he? Two bullets have gone to waste, you won’t be able to kill one hundred students so you have  _ failed. _ ’’ 

Suddenly, Stephen aimed at something else than Alex. The barrel of the gun was facing Luke, who took a frightened step back. Alex didn’t even think when he grabbed Stephen’s arm to drag the gun away. A new shot was fired.  _ Ninety two. _

Alex knew that he had moved the gun away from Luke’s chest, but he had no idea where. He didn’t look. He didn’t  _ want _ to look. 

Instead, he grabbed Stephen’s arm even more tight and tried to push it on his back. Stephen cried out in pain when his arm was almost being pushed out of its socket and, in a reflex, let the gun fall to the floor. Alex kicked it away and tried to push the man to the ground, but he no longer had the tool of surprise on his side to help him. Stephen was at least a head taller than him, and much more muscular. 

The man elbowed him to his head, making Alex fall to the floor. He climbed on top of the boy and tried to choke him, his fingers pushing into his throat deeply. Black spots started to dance in front of Alex’s vision as he felt himself slowly slipping away. He was barely even able to see Reggie run towards them with a fire extinguisher, knocking Stephen out with one direct hit. The man fell down with a loud thud and laid there as if he were a rag. Alex turned on his side and coughed for air, letting Reggie help him sit up. 

For the first time, he dared to look at Luke. There he sat, against the wall, with a bandage around his leg made out of Bobby’s sleeve. He was alive, had only been shot in the leg. Alex couldn’t help himself from smiling as he looked at Reggie, who looked at him with concern. ‘‘It’s over,’’ he chuckled dryly. Reggie smiled back, looking over at Luke and Bobby. ‘‘Guys, I have still been shot in the leg and Alex just got choked, can we go outside for help?’’ Luke remarked jokingly, making the rest of the band huff out a bit of air. 

‘‘Sure,’’ Bobby responded. He retrieved the pressure he was putting on Luke’s leg and got back to kicking the door. The lock had already been smashed for the most part, so it only took three more kicks for the door to open. The bright light of the sun that peeked through the small opening blinded Alex for a bit. He put his hands in front of his eyes and accepted Reggie’s hand to pull him up. One hand wrapped around his arm, he walked through the door. 

At first, multiple guns were pointed at him, but they were quickly removed when it was clear that he was innocent. The blood that was pouring from the hairline fracture above his eyebrow and the handprints around his neck were enough proof. Reggie walked behind him, a supporting hand on his shoulder. Multiple ambulance staff came running up to them with shock blankets, but Alex declined it with a small push. He only wanted to be able to breathe the clean air, to see the light of the sun again. He wanted to hug his friends. 

The first couple of minutes that happened went by without Alex realising. He didn’t even register him and Luke being pushed into an ambulance, neither did he feel the wound on his head getting cleaned up. His fingers had been wrapped around his inhaler the entire time, waiting for the moment that he would need it. He was surprised that he didn’t need to use it since he had been choked a few minutes before. 

There was a bit of commotion next to him, and he didn’t have to look at the person to know it was Bobby. There was a bit of silence in which they stared at the school, trying to avoid having to look at all of the corpses being dragged out under white sheets.

‘‘Was it true, what you said in there?’’ Alex broke the silence, still not looking away from the building. ‘‘Was what true?’’ Bobby replied softly, his voice raw and broken. ‘‘About you being afraid of other people’s opinions on you.’’

‘‘Just as true as the other stuff I said in there. That I care about Luke, Reggie and you.’’ Alex turned his head to look at Bobby and smiled, getting a similar one in return. A few footsteps came, and Reggie appeared in front of the opened doors of the ambulance. ‘‘Look at you guys being all emotional,’’ he joked dryly. The bassist was met with a plastic glove being thrown at his face. He chuckled for a bit and then sat down next to Bobby. ‘‘Where’s Luke?’’ Alex asked. 

‘‘He’s in the other ambulance, getting his leg treated. He’s gonna be okay,’’ Reggie answered, motioning to the left with his thumb. Right at that moment Luke appeared with a crutch under his arm, limping on his left leg. ‘‘I heard my name?’’ he commented. Reggie stood up to support the boy and motioned for the other two to join in. Alex didn’t think for another second before he stood up to join the hug, pulling Bobby with him. He closed his eyes and held on to the three boys, not wanting to let go anytime soon. ‘‘I love you all.’’


End file.
